I’m traipsing around the internet, trying to find something really yummy about Rob to give me a great blog topic. I got nothing, but during all of this I started reading comments to these horrible gossip
Hi. I'm Rob. Please stay at least 50 feet away from me.
stories. I’m pretty sure I’ve discovered exactly why all the media thinks the Rob fans are tweenies. It’s because they are the only ones that comment on their stories.
Here are some of the best ones I found over the past couple days:
OK! Magazines Hottest 25 Under 25
ROBER PATTISON IS NOT HOT ! HE IS SO UGLY !!! MAY BE HE IS A LITTLE SEXY .. CHACE CRAWFORD OR ZAC EFRON SHOULD BE NUMBER ONE . THEY ARE SO HOT , I WOULD LOVE TO FUCK THEM ALL NIGHT LONG AND OF COURSE MEGAN NUMBER ONE , SHE IS MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN ALL OTHER CELEBRITIES ! SHE IS TOO BEAUTIFUL , HOT AND REALLY SEXY . SHE IS JUST PERFECT .
So he is so ugly, but maybe a little sexy? What? Make up your damn mind cause you can’t be both. Oh and by the way, having toe thumbs does not make you perfect.
robert pattison is like super hot but talylor lautner is like way hotter and i mean no offence to robert but like talyor should be #1 and robert#2
Like, when you like type out like your comments and junk, could you like not like use the word like every other like word. Kthanxbai!
More after the jump! Beware your IQ may drop the more you read!Who Has a More Promising Career, Zac or Rob?
taking KS to a game? jeez they’re not into this stuff, it doesn’t interest them, so why should they? Let them do what they like doing.
I don’t think Ted was going to back them in the back of his SUV, blind folded and gagged, and force them to a Lakers game. Plus, um, wow, that’s so cool you know exactly that Rob and KStew like!
Robert….stick to making interesting movies….I don’t want to see you on a TV show…..your personality shines with interviews……I want to see more of them…….I think part of Roberts appeal is that he is not full of himself…….he does what he wants to do……he’s a movie star and that’s what he should be doing!
I…don’t…think…you…understand…how…ellipses…work… What are you ommitting? All your crazy?!?
Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson: Lots of Laughs
taylor lautner is so gorgeous and so is robert pattinson they’re both hot. im in(L) with them both ha:L and kristen is really pretty. xxxxx
Hey tweenie! You have to choose!! You cannot have both, I don’t care how L you are with both of them.
Taylor is weird looking…not cute at all…Rob on the other hand looks…hot! aw, i miss you michael jackson ;(
These peeps are crazy. You think I'd marry this drunk dude?
I have NEVER seen anyone call Taylor weird looking. And I’m sure your MJ shout out fits perfectly with saying how hot Rob looks.
Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart Are NOT Getting Married This Weekend!
i think that they might be getting married. because i was listening 2 kiss.f.m radio and they said that they were going 2 there wedding this weekend!!!! SHOCK!!!!
SHOCK! Kiss.FM is probably about as reliable as OK! Magazine. They probably were also giving away invitations to the 9th caller and you won! SHOCK!!
WE LOVE YOU!!!!!! And Taylor LAUTENER is still available.WOO HOO!!!!!!!!
OMG! I am such a huge Taylor fan that I have to express myself with tons of explanation points and not even bother to learn how to spell his last name. Gather round young fans – LAUTNER, L-A-U-T-N-E-R, LAUTNER.
Next time you are out reading some horrid rag of an article, just say screw it and scroll to the bottom. The comments provide far more entertainment then most articles themselves!
LikeROBER PATTISON IS NOT HOT ! HE IS SO UGLY !!! MAY BE HE IS A LITTLE SEXY .. CHACE CRAWFORD OR ZAC EFRON SHOULD BE NUMBER ONE . THEY ARE SO HOT , I WOULD LOVE TO FUCK THEM ALL NIGHT LONG AND OF COURSE MEGAN NUMBER ONE , SHE IS MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN ALL OTHER CELEBRITIES ! SHE IS TOO BEAUTIFUL , HOT AND REALLY SEXY . SHE IS JUST PERFECT .
September 16th, 2009 at 2:35 am
Oh man, this was hilarious. I love your blog, “like” really much *lmao*. I usually do exactly as you suggest at the end of your post. I skip the article and read the comments, they’re usually far more entertaining. *lol*
By the way, have mercy if there are mistakes in my post, because English isn’t my first language. *lol*
September 16th, 2009 at 8:53 am
Trust me. You write in English much better then most teens in the United States. Trust me.
September 16th, 2009 at 2:40 am
Bless you for reading those comments. All that poor spelling, grammar and punctuation give me a borderline seizure!
September 16th, 2009 at 4:19 am
Oh my gosh I am in love with this! Honestly the fact that people cannot put together coherent sentences when trying to say anything about Taylor or Robert just makes me laugh. You would think by the time someone has reached adulthood they would be able to say something that isn’t simply childish or valley girl sounding. This definitely makes me smile and makes me thankful that when I do comment on posts by other people about Rob or Tay, I at least take the time to think it out and not sound like I’m 10!
September 16th, 2009 at 8:54 am
I can’t put coherent thoughts together when I think about Rob, but then again I know how to reread things and use spell check so it looks like I am sort of sane.
September 16th, 2009 at 5:00 am
Yes, I agree; the comments are usually the biggest reason for reading the blog in the first place. Twi-related and, in particular, Rob and Kristen-related comments are generally hilarious. The passion expressed by the fans kicks their comments up to a whole new level, especially when the different sides start arguing with each other. Along comes some crazy gal who calls everyone else fugly for daring to have a different opinion from her. Then there is the spelling and the grammar, or lack thereof. Sometimes that adds more to the general hilarity than the content of the comments.
September 16th, 2009 at 8:55 am
I love the comments on the Robsten articles. Whether you are Robsten or Nonsten, they are absolutely hilarious. Cracks me up!
September 16th, 2009 at 7:35 am
Oh, how this post made me laugh and cry at the same time!
I taught English in junior high and high school for 9 years. Sometimes I read comments made by these children and think I left teaching too early. (I am sooo, like, totally, ya know, embarrassed.)
Perhaps there should be a fangirl-check installed in all computers? If one uses “like” as something other than a verb or in a simile, fangirl check will automatically strike it. If one strings too many adjectives together, fangirl check will limit to one. Hmm. Thanks for the inspiration. I must call Bill Gates now!
September 16th, 2009 at 8:56 am
I would so install that on my blog, but only for when I type. I like when every one else fangirls out!
September 16th, 2009 at 9:15 am
This is wonderful!! I really love this one. Btw i love when you said that “…Kiss.FM is probably about as reliable as OK! Magazine…”. I mean well, there’s no problem if they love to see Rob and Kris but they shouldn’t tell lies.
September 16th, 2009 at 9:26 am
Hey, what makes you think I’m not 13 LOL and I believe its spelled Laudner. heehee
<3
September 16th, 2009 at 9:27 am
Oh wait, Launder?
September 19th, 2009 at 4:26 am
Aw, crap… I just remembered that I was supposed to wash clothes tonight!
September 16th, 2009 at 12:32 pm
Um, I may have commented something similar to those when my Pattinsonism hit full force back in May. He’s, just, like, so, like, freaking hot, U no?
September 16th, 2009 at 1:58 pm
Hahaha, This made my day.. lil girls are too funny! LOVE your blog.
September 16th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
Ha Ha! This was so funny, I was laughing my butt off!
I love it when people spell it Taylor Laudner, or Rob Patterson-really shows their devotion.
September 16th, 2009 at 9:52 pm
Its hilarious when “true fans” misspell or totally get his name wrong! Ive seen many “Pattison” and “Patterson”
September 16th, 2009 at 10:10 pm
Isn’t that that Rob Patterson guy? You know the guy that plays in that vampire movie where they sparkle?
September 16th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
I truly feel just a tiny bit dumber just after reading the few comments you re-posted here. Bless you for sifting through them ALL for our amusement!!
I think the main reason media outlets choose to disregard people who can actually make coherent statements is that it’s much more difficult to poke fun of “those” types of comments, than those that sound like they were written by every teenybopper that ever lived. Serious is way less fun than laughing at someone elses expense, right? It is in the media world, at least.
Another brilliant post! I’m gonna, like, go take some Motrin now for my headache & obsess about Edward. Wait, what? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN EDWARD ISN’T REAL??!?!?!
September 19th, 2009 at 4:25 am
Those crazy comments make my brain bleed.