Okay, first off… this is most obviously one of the most bogus stories ever on Rob. Pictures of the anchor tattoos, or it didn’t happen.
But, let’s just throw all probability out the window. Cause this blog isn’t about serious news business. I like to have fun. And a voo doo wedding is the perfect opportunity!
So, word on the tabloid street is that there are wedding bells. But they are dark and play the kind of music that you hear in a slasher film before someone get’s the axe. Cause, according to the article. that is how the Stew likes it.
“Kristen is quite dark so she wants a ceremony performed by a New Orleans voodoo priestess.”
That Kristen. You know she’s a dark girl. I mean, anyone with a pair of skinny jeans, converse and a hoodie must be dark and kind of emo. And since Kristen fits that description, as well as myself on a random Saturday, we must be into the voodoo.
And what exactly does a voodoo wedding look like? Cause all I can think of is this…
Rob? KStew? Is that you?!?
“They want to keep speculation to a minimum, so won’t get rings, but each is going to choose a present that reminds them of just how much they love each other.
Yes yes. Cause NOT wearing wedding rings will cause less speculation. Clearly this “quote” came from a person that truly understands the meaning of the word “speculation”. Ohhhhh… and what kind of present says I love you when you are Rob? Matching beanies?
And my personal crazy moment of the article…
“And they’re going to both get matching tattoos on their hips. They want tiny anchors to symbolise that they ground each other and keep each other calm when things get stormy.”
Bwahahahahaha!!! Personally, I’m gonna go ahead and say that I don’t think Rob will be getting a tattoo anytime soon. I
Needles don't scare me.....
like to think he is like me… who is scared shitless of needles, especially when said needles bring pain rather then make pain go away.
Besides, if Rob is a tattoo kind of man, the anchor may compete too much with his HUGE “I <3 Bella” tramp stamp tattoo. Just not gonna work.
I know I’m a bit off the Rob trail today, but srsly, whether you are a Robsten, a Nonsten or you could really care less one way or the other (HOLLA!), it’s so ludicrious, it’s funny.
I mean, I’m sure if Rob and the Stew really decided to marry whilst in Louisiana (which I hope that, together or not, neither of them tie the knot anytime soon since they are so young!), they’d just wrap it all into Breaking Dawn. Save the money on the dress, and the decorations, and I vote for Peter getting ordained on the internet. That would truly be the hobo way.
And that last paragraph will be picked up by a tabloid in 3….2….1….
